My day is constant change. Each moment carries within itself a contradiction: one day passes easily, with clear purpose and inner peace, while the next is like a mirror in which I lose myself, not knowing who I am. In the same hour, I can feel alive, full of energy, as if the whole world understands me. In the next hour, without reason, doubt creeps in, as if someone erased my inner map, and I no longer know where I’m going.

Emotions are like waves—one day they gently caress, the next they engulf me, pulling me into the unknown. Yet these fluctuations become a part of my daily existence. Expectations shift as well—one day they stand firmly before me, promising everything I desire. The next day they turn into shadows, impossible to grasp.

But perhaps this is the true rhythm of life? I am inevitably tied to a constantly shifting self, like a fleeting glance at who I am. Maybe the essence lies in the fact that each day allows me to experience everything—from fullness to emptiness. Every feeling, even the whisper of anxiety, is part of my journey through myself.

Yes, there are days when I feel I am. I feel connected to the world, I sense my inner balance. But there are also days when I lose myself, when I don’t know what lies behind my thoughts. Yet it is precisely that loss that becomes a new discovery. Each day is a search and a reconciliation with the fact that nothing is permanent. I am a constantly changing phenomenon, living between what is clear and what is inevitably intangible.

Perhaps true peace comes not from understanding who I am each day, but from accepting and allowing myself not to know.

Arūnas